I preface this post by sharing with you an excerpt from a letter I wrote to a very dear friend of mine:
"There will come a time after you have finished your studies when you feel lost without a tutor or a subject coordinator to guide you or tell you what you're doing wrong. Pursuing one's passion is like setting off to sea without a map, searching for unknown lands to conquer. You don't know exactly where you're headed, but you know you will get there eventually. People will tell you you are crazy, and soon you will begin to think it yourself. You will see others with maps heading towards safer destinations, and there you are, floating in the opposite direction, wondering whether to abandon your quest and join the mainstream, or continue into uncharted waters. You will feel lost at times, and you will begin to question whether you've gambled everything only to perish in the middle of the ocean, but you hold on to the hope that when the fog lifts you will again see the horizon and you will know then exactly where you're going."
This drawing is a 'procrastination piece'. Incidentally, it is also reflective of my current state of mind.
To be honest, I've been struggling to concentrate on my current project due to a few things stewing in my mind. Actually, I'd like to get something off my chest...
I'm not gonna lie, it's tough doing this art thing.
Since completing my University studies, there was a plan - put my degree to good use and get a job in the fashion industry. But then I discovered there wasn't anything I wanted to do within the industry. What I wanted, more than anything else in the world, was to create beautiful illustrations.
I've been trying ever since.
I didn't go to art school, so I've spent the last year trying to develop/refine my hand drawing techniques. It's hard when you're doing it all on your own, even harder when the only thing you have to go on are the images in your head and your gut feeling that you're doing something right. I feel like I've worked so hard and I believe that I have made some progress. But it's been tough. Some days I believe I can do it, but then there are also days when I feel like putting down the pencils and walking away.
I live day by day questioning whether I've made the right choices, whether I'm good enough to pursue this dream or whether I'm just kidding myself. I ask myself these same questions over and over again. However, in the end, I alway come to the conclusion that I believe I have made the right decision, and I will go on record and swear that I will pursue this passion to the very end...
So it upsets me when I find out that certain people in my life, who supposedly 'have my back', feel that they are in any sort of position to question my choices.
So, to these naysayers, I will keep it brief:
Get. The Hell. Off. My. Ship. !
...or Snip. Snip.
- S.
